Monday, April 11, 2005

ego-handjob

noun. An environmentally-friendly sexual act that...oh sorry, I thought that said "eco-handjob." Let's go with this instead: Metaphorical hand-to-weenie contact resulting in a happy ego ending.

Real citation: "Would some thin-wristed shoe-gazing bass player please hurry up and fuck this girl? Once confined to her ultra-vapid sycophantic hipster blog Ultragrrrl, Sarah Lewitinn has somehow parlayed her love for wimpy bands and kitsch into a career as a record promoter and talking head about—two guesses—wimpy bands and kitsch. Lewitinn's Spin column, "Making Out with Ultragrrrl," chronicled her giving numerous bands ego-handjobs back stage as she drunkenly hung on them, making funny rock-star poses."
("50 MOST LOATHSOMENEW YORKERS," New York Press, http://nypress.com/18/13/news&columns/50most.cfm)

Made-up citation: "I will give ego-handjobs when the occasion demands, but I much prefer delivering the atomic ego-wedgie."

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