Tuesday, September 02, 2008

muffinward

preposition. A delicious direction, right up there with cookieward and cupcakeward.

Real citation: "The only things that can lure me to the suburbs are sex and Dunkin' Donuts blueberry muffins, which come marbled with exquisite saturated fats like fine Kobe beef.
Sex is far less predictably appetizing, so when you're crossing the city line via surface transit for a questionable encounter with a stranger, you begin to wish you were heading muffinward instead. Nevertheless, this particular muggy June afternoon, I found myself on my way to the suburbs for the non-muffin reason, from Washington, D.C. to the cultural abyss of Rockville, Maryland. I surveyed my fellow bus passengers. Most of them gazed despondently out their windows like freshly convicted inmates being transported to a facility for long-term supervision"
(June 25, 2007, Will Doig, Nerve, http://www.nerve.com/regulars/badsex/022/)

Made-up citation: "You have temped me with your seductive scones of sin. But I shall resist! I will continue muffinward, like my forefathers, not knowing if this world has any muffins or heroes left at all."

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